Close Enounters of the Celebrity kind...

so, today I waited on slash....


honestly, I didn't even know it was him until someone said something to me...still. It's kinda cool, I guess.

DAAAAD...Tom Cruise won't come out of the closet!

As my Nana likes to say, you can plan your steps, but the LORD knows your future....or, something like that...

anyhoo, tonight, I planned to go pick up my friend Kelly, head down to Hollywood, and go see a free Q and A screening of that new, really hot movie "Wanted." You know, the one with Angelina Jolie and James McAvoy...


The confirmation email clearly did state that they DO overbook these free screenings, and that you should arrive plenty early to get admitted. Kelly and I showed up an hour and ten minutes early, and the line was already wrapping around the Los Angeles Film School building. We stood in line for about 2 minutes, then realized that the theater was most likely not big enough to seat everyone in line up until us. So we walked west on Sunset and hit up a coffee bean, then had the brilliant idea to go stop in at the church of Scientology building on Hollywood. It was close by, and we were both up for an adventure, plus we were just down right curious.

So we walk in, and its a very nice building, which I'm sure is funded by its many celeb and otherwise richy rich church members, and behind the front desk sits a very pretty, perfect skin, perfect smile, perfect hair, perfect little size zero, woman, who greeted us with a smile and asked how she could help us. I quickly said, "ah, yes, we would like to take the tour."
"Very good, it will take about 40 minutes to walk through. If you will just take a seat, and I'll get there receptionist."

So, Kelly and I took a seat and read all the nicely illuminated quotes about how amazing and wonderful Scientology and its founder, L. Ron Hubbard are. Of course, Tom Cruise, Kirstie Alley, and John Travolta were among the quotees. We were soon ushered into the tour by the same girl who greeted us, I guess she couldn't find the "receptionist" who was supposed to take us through the tour herself, so she did it.

It was really all about L. Ron Hubbard....which, after you've heard L. Ron enough, you start to think of that rather unfortunate company that went under a few years back....but anyway, apparently he was some Navy officer son who grew up with indians and was some prodigy eagle scout who traveled the world on Naval ships and studied EXACTLY 21 different cultures, always in pursuit of answering the deep questions of life, such as the existence of Man and Life and all that jazz. He studied engineering in college so he was pretty scientific, but he also was really intruiged by eastern religions he came in contact with in his travels, so he tried to find a way to apply the reason of science to...eastern mysticism. Seems kinda contradictory, but oh well.

He was also a very prolific writer of pulp fiction and sci fi novels. That's what he's most known for really. He then wrote this very famous book called "Dianetics," which attempts to answer questions of people's mental state and how they come to behave in certain ways. They think that every condition is linked to an event that happened in your life, because you have a part of your brain called your "reactive mind," which is constantly recording everything that happens to you in your life, while your are conscious OR EVEN UNCONSCIOUS. (dun dun dun....) Let's say you are afraid of clowns. Now, most people would call you crazy and irrational to have a fear of clowns right? Why on earth are you afraid of clowns?! For the life of you, you cant' remember. Scientology has the answer. You go to "auditing," which is basically their spiritual mentoring, and you sit down and hold an "e- meter" (which is basically some weird dial with two wires attached to two tin cans which you hold in your hand) and you go back to that first traumatic experience you had with clowns that made you act in your irrational manner. Through your auditing, you work to get over all your fears and whatnot, so that you are now a normal person who is unafraid of clowns.

In fact, Kelly and I got to experience this emeter thing first hand. The girl told us to hold a tin can in each hand and think of something that makes us angry. I did it, and sure enough, the little arrow on the dial shot from the left to the right. On Kelly it did the same thing. I asked, "are you sure this has nothing to do with rising blood pressure, or anything like that?"
"Oh, no, your thoughts are energy, this machine sends a current of energy through your body, and your thoughts exert a certain resistance to the energy current."

ah...its all so clear now.

Of course you don't learn the REALLY creepy things about scientology by going on the tour. That knowledge only comes with being a member of the church for many years. Fortunately, a girl left the church not long ago and posted all this top secret info on her website, which the peeps at South Park found and made a show out of. Apparently, everything in this episode is real...watch it. It's pretty gosh darn funny as well as informative.

TRAPPED IN THE CLOSET
http://www.southparkstudios.com/guide/912

corporate nit-picky insanity!

So, you may or may not be aware that to survive, I work at a very popular, very corporate restaurant. Thats sells a lot of cheesecake.

It pays the bills, ok?

But anyway, every 6 months or so, they like to shake things up a bit, and add a few new things to the already novel size menu. There's a lot of hoopla involved in this process. In the week leading up to the day when we release the new menu, a bunch of corporate people I've never seen before are in the restaurant, inspecting everything and making everyone a little nervous. But one thing that always throws me for a loop every time this time of year rolls around, is their meticulous attention to detail. We're talking crazy meticulous. If you have ever watched one of my favorite shows, Monk, then you think you know an obsessive compulsive person. But Monk pales in comparison.

Today, while walking through the kitchen, I heard one of them say, "I think we need to move this patty a little closer to the edge of the bun." They were, of course, referring to a hamburger. I took a quick glance to glimpse the hamburger in question. Seriously, the patty and the bun were the same size. I have no idea how they could've moved it any closer to the edge.

But then again, I'm not pulling out a ruler to make sure the opening of a sandwhich is exactly 2 inches wide.

And yes, I do realize that was the most pointless and random entry ever. But next time you dine out at a large corporate chain, think of how much time and effort they put into making sure your bun and your patty match up just so.

~*Jessica*~

Back in Bizness

So. After quite the hiatus from my blog, I am back. My dear little macbook was having some issues, but thanks to the fantabulous geniuses at the genius bar at the mac store, my baby is even better than new. Things have been pretty good during my silence. A few eventful events occured, such as my 20th birthday. It was pretty fun, thanks to my awesome boyfriend Jake who made it all possible. I originally had expressed a wish to spend my DOB at the beach, and all week long I anticipated that lovely day off which I would spend in the sun. Unfortunately, I think I looked forward to it so much that even the clouds heard my inner monologue and decided to rain, just for my birthday, just out of spite. Seriously, my birthday is the one and only day that it has actually rained during my entire life here in California. But, all was not lost. Jake and I went to see the much anticipated Indiana Jones movie, and I must say, despite what everyone else says, I really enjoyed it. Then, Jake took me out to Katsuya on Hollywood and Highland, quite the trendy sushi joint. And, to top it all off, he got me a surfboard for my bday! Now, if I could just get myself to the beach to ride it...that would be ideal.

I also had my first gig, ever. Well, it wasn't much, i'll admit, just a background role on Cold Case. But hey, it was fun anyway! Nothing like getting your hair and makeup done, then waiting around forever, chatting up your fellow extras, all while eating all the goodies from the very well stocked craft services. Actually, that day was a bit commical for me as they asked for all the girls to have their hair set and dried in sponge rollers. Just to be safe, I put mine in first thing in the morning and wore them the whole day up until the shoot. To hide the curlers, I wrapped my head in this scarf. Needless to say, as I strolled the well stocked aisles of Costco, I got some double takes.



It was only a 4 hour shoot, but I think I'll definitely be in the shot. So watch for me in the flashback scene of the season premiere of Cold Case this fall...or whenever its premiering... I'll definitely look that up and get back to you on the date of that.

Downside of the shoot: I lost my favorite yellow patent leather ballet flats. The world isn't quite the same without them.

Today was pretty wonderful. I had a day off, and a much needed day off it was too. I went to Kickboxing class, went shopping at forever 21, and came home and cleaned in preparation of showing the vacant room to a potential roommate. Well, the potential roommate was a no show, so I decided to take my slightly unride-able bike to this great placed called the bicycle kitchen.

They're a non-profit, volunteer run shop at Helliotrope and Melrose who are there to teach you how to fix your bike, among other bike related things. Basically, they just want people to ride their bikes more, and drive less. And with gas prices at around 4.50 a gallon, I'm all for that too. Everyone was really nice and helpful. The idea of the place is that you fix your bike through their teaching. Well, I didn't really fix much. The guy who helped me did most the work, but props to him for doing it one handed: he was eating an icecream cone of gelato from the ice cream shop next door. pretty impressive. His gelato looked so good in fact, that I decided to have gelato for dinner, and what a good decision that was. (I pretty much can't resist gelato, its a fact.) Its this great place called "Scoops." It doesn't look like much, but damn is it ever good! and their flavor choices are so original...they had banana mint, chocolate cinnamon, pistachio and dates....i went with a scoop of raisins and marsala wine and brown bread, which was kinda brown sugary with crunchyness in it.

After shoving my bike into the trunk of my Jetta the best I could (it didn't quite fit, I had to tie it down and let the back tire stick out of the trunk a bit), I got home, hopped on my bike, and headed off. I rode around for about 2 hours, in which time I went to the 99 cent store (talk about a cheapo night) and long's drugs. As I was searching for a place to lock my bike to at the drugstore, some punk teenage boys pulled up and asked me if I was russian. I said not a bit. Then they asked if I was italian, to which i replied, not very much. Hispanic? I'm portuguese I said. The dude behind the passenger seat asked me to marry him. I laughed and said I was taken. He threw a mini temper tantrum and stepped on the gas.

LA. What a strange town it is, indeed.